One year ago today I sat in a dimly lit hospital room holding the hand of one of the most courageous mothers I know. Sara had been gracefully working her way through labor. Her eyes reveled a tender sorrow but in them there was peace. Her first born, Levi, was already with Jesus. It was a loss too great for words and yet each person who entered the room was struck by its peace. The presence of our maker filled the room. As I stroked Sara's beautiful dark hair I knew, we will never be the same. We will love more deeply because Christ is holding us now.
My body aced from a depth I had never know as I held little Levi. Perfect, with his mothers full lips and his fathers brow, they tenderly wrapped him up and we embraced God's gift. Some how I expected him to just start breathing. It was all a mistake, he's fine, I thought. He was truly beautiful.
Thinking back, I am so grateful for so many things. Thank you to Sara for being the most transparent person I have ever known. For allowing me to experience your happiest days and your darkest moments. I am changed because of Gods work through you. To the Doctors and staff who could not have been more compassionate. I am humbled to have met you. To my dear friend Jackie who was constantly praying and encouraging everyone. Your words and soft spirit bless me more then you'll ever know. To my wonderful husband who supported me and loved me through my grieving. You cared for our children without a single moment of hesitation. I love you all.
God is good and we anxiously await the arrival of baby Milla any day. Levi, I will never forget you and I look forward to seeing your face again in heaven.