Thursday, October 7, 2010

Request From A Mommy

I have really been enjoying reading all the other 31 for 21 blogs.  Check them out at
http://unringingthebell.typepad.com/my_weblog/2010/09/4th-annual-31-for-21-blog-challenge.html
or click on the 31 for 21 button at the top of the page.

One mom at http://hapagirlhapafamily.blogspot.com/ made a little list for people who are not sure how to interact with a family who has a child with Down Syndrome.  I enjoyed it because I cannot tell you how many times all of these happen.  Probably one daily.  We know how hard it is to find the wright words in an unknown situation and you'll find most parents quite understanding.
  1.  Please please please try not to say that our children are angels and a blessing.  Although, you might be sincere, but truthfully, all my children are angels and blessings.  Having Down syndrome does not make you become soft and gentle, always smiling and giving.  Because if that's the case, then Lillian does not have Down syndrome :)  Her brother and sister can vouche for that!
  2. As much as it doesn't make any sense to you, please refer to my child as a child with Down syndrome.  I know that my child has Down syndrome, but she still is a child first (people first language)
  3. Does she have a mild case of Down syndrome?  Ummm...well, mild compared to what?  You either have Down syndrome or not.  Whether she could be high functioning or not, Down syndrome does not come in ranges.
  4. And never ever say, "I'm sorry".  To me it sounds like you think we are living such a poor and  unhappy life.  But, what I've learned from Lillian is that you choose to make your own happiness, and that I could never be sorry for.
So, really all I'm asking is for you to just be happy for me.  Tell me that my children are all so beautiful, smart and kind.  With that, you can't go wrong. 

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